Am I shouting?

It started off as a childish act,
what would later become a hard fact,
"Don't climb trees!Behave around boys!!",
So I climbed the highest tree after stealing their toys!

My childish prank they did forgive,
But not the rules about how I should live,
Was it my narrow-minded world views?
What others accepted as norm,to me was news.

In my own way,I put up a fight,
For what I believed in,and thought my right;
I recoiled in shock and disgrace,
when I was told I'm wrong,to my face!

It took me a while to realize,
That it was a mindset that cut me to size.
It would take another to recognize,
The world is sustained on a web of lies.

So here I stand,raising my voice,
When all complain about the needless noise.
All these farcical rules,I am flouting,
To make my point,Am I shouting?

Tat tvam asi

It's wierd how life is the greatest leveller.You think you are in charge,and then..Voila! Life happens!
The funny thing about life is, we can only understand and appreciate it in retrospective.
While it's happening right before us, we are in a complete state of disarray! Foiled plans, shattered dreams,
broken hearts and all that jazz.

But it's only in retrospective that we realize, how it was the best thing that could have happened to us.
How some plans would have been suicidal.How some jerks would have ruined our lives.How some failures taught us more than had it been a success in the first place.

Yes, we all have regrets, about what should have or could have been...but instead of lamenting over that something we have no control over, if we are willing to acknowledge and appreciate what we have today, the world would be a much better place....

For at the end of the day..what are we? Anything that we conceive and perceive..that we become..that we acheive..Tat tvam asi

Forgive to Forget

I've been holding in a lot of bitterness for a while now. I've finally released it today.Man!It feels great!!
It's like a great load is off my chest.And I can smile again.The smile that could light up my eyes and a several thousand lives :)

It's true.Unless you forgive, you can't forget.And in order to forget,you must be willing to forgive.So, I forgive you, for all the wrongs done.I forgive myself,for being so bitter so long.I forgive the world, that failed to understand me through it all.

I am free of all bondages.I am free to start my life again. To smile without guile and to be happy because I actually feel it.

There!I'm done fretting.I've arrived in the today!!

Musings

It’s been a while,

Since a smile,

Adorned my face,

In all it’s grace,

For all the tears,

Through the years,

That I had cried,

And then they dried,

And now you’re here,

I peek through despite my fear,

Is this light I see?

Are we meant to be??

From Atheism to Prayer..

Radical changes, I suppose :) For someone who has sworn by atheism all her life(ironic usage- to swear!!),I am beginning to see light in the concept of prayer.No,it does not account for the ugliness of religion,but yes,it mostly involves introspection,assertion and meditation.This is spirituality - my way!

It doesn't say I am a sinner and I need to be punished for all the wrongs and glorified for my rights.Niether do I wanna propogate the fantastic notion that I am God.It is more of the notion that - God resides within me,as me.Just need to listen to that presence.And that listening requires me to quieten all the noise constantly buzzing around me,making things hazy.

Hence the prayer - To admit something is not as desired and to state the conflict in clear terms.To assert what is desired and why.To be clear about one's objectives,without any doubt about the reason for that desire.

The meditation - To quieten the anxiety associated with the desire and to listen to your inner voice for guidance.

There is no need for an idol of any sort,just the faith that if there exists a problem,there also exists a solution.
It's that simple,really.

Moment of truth :)

Introspection in full flow..first question..why do I need to talk?What's my innate need to ramble away to glory?I wasn't this talkative as a kid!!

Answer : As a kid, I used to doodle..draw..the outlet to all my expressions.What's talking but a way of expressing oneself?A picture speaks a thousand words(probably that's the reason when I drew,I didn't need to talk that much :P It all makes sense :D)

11:11 PM.Hmmm...what do I wish for?Stop acting crazy!!(Naah...it's who I am;))

Ok...I had to let all that out of my system. I may not be too proud of myself when I see this post next time around :D Ehh..well...guess it's worth it!!!

Goodbye Blog!!

Back to writing diaries :)

Hope...keeps the world afloat..

Well yes..isn't that true?No matter how many hardships we face, we conquer them.And while the adage goes - once bitten,twice shy..sometimes we trustingly try again.What justifies such irrational behaviour?It's a single emotion - Hope.

Been through a lot of seemingly negative experiences off late.Not complaining.It gave me an opportunity to grow,to discover hitherto latent talents for one!It helped rediscover myself,this time, through my own eyes.

It has been an agelong folly of mine, to measure my self worth through another person's point of view.I need to give myself a break!These days, I've adopted a new way of life. Now, I love it when people take me for an idiot, it makes it all the more fun to prove them wrong ;)

I've come to realize I am an extremely strong person.Stronger than I give myself credit for.As a kid, I was a famous 'cry baby'.Over the years, I have turned into an uncannily dry-eyed adult.

Crying is a release mechanism.It is required when you are holding in a lot of baggage.I have learnt to let go off mine.That's probably why I don't cry anymore.I have learnt to accept things as they are...which, strangely isn't the same as giving up.It's probably the wisdom of knowing that events/circumstances are not always going to be in your control.But, that does not imply one should get worked up.It only means, you have been provided with a new avenue to discover your happiness!

At the end of the day, every human being wants to be loved and accepted, appreciated for being who they are.Living in constant pressure of undue expectations,and fear of failing to live up to those expectations..that's not what life is all about.It shouldn't be what life is all about!!

Life is about being happy and joyous at every stage.And how can one appreciate sunshine without a bit of rain?On hindsight,at the end of it all, one also gets to discover the wonderful rainbow:)

Personality disorder?

Been thinking about my past today..childhood memories and stuff like that..been going over my growth over the years...strangely draining experience...only one thing that I really enjoyed in the montage of images flashing through my mind...I am a very interesting person :) I have a plethora of interests and sub-interests if you may!

I am a simple person who seems complicated..or a complex person who appears simple:) Heck I can't confirm for myself...keeps me interested in myself:D Obnoxious? Maybe..although I'd say I am someone who got lost in my own mind ;)

Higher Calling..

Been watching a lot of motivational videos off late. Summarized my understanding of what I think is the common message conveyed through all of them -

Pain is temporary,but if you quit,it'll last forever.At the end of pain is success.Our purpose in life, is to love unconditionally - KINDNESS,TOLERANCE,FAITH,HOPE,JOY and HAPPINESS - every living being needs it.
LOVE enables us to provide all of this.You have been endowed with a gift.A gift to love unconditionally.A gift that will always and only bring joy to the receiver.So go on, spread the joy while you can.
The world seems to have forgotten that these simple values are what life is truly made of.And it's time the world re-discovered them.

I believe in me...but in you I trust

Moving out of my comfort zone,
Exploring a path hitherto unforeknown,
Strangely the adventure doesn't bother me,
As much as my sense of invincibility.
Uncertain thoughts constantly cross my mind,
Am I bordering on foolishness,being blind?
But then I think of the goal I seek,
And strength surges through,I'm no longer weak.
Will I succeed in my endeavour,you ask?
I think of my goal,and proceed completing my task.
No point in shouting words of caution till you're hoarse,
Sometimes you need to let time run its course.
Eventually I'll succeed,I trust,
Until then,trudge along my path I must